Earth.
Birth place of the human race.

A species
much like our own.

Capable
of great compassion...

17,000 BC.

and great violence.

For in our quest
to protect the humans,

a deeper revelation dawns.

Our worlds
have met before.

Here, here.

Transformers:
Revenge of The Fallen

Shanghai, China,
22:14, Today

Breaking news
at Shanghai.

There's been a major toxic spill
on the Shanghai Central District.

- Citizens today--
- For today,

our topic that's
a developing story for you,

we will bring you
any new information

as we get it...

Pentagon:
NEST Central Command

- What's the status?
- C-hawks approaching target.

Three minutes
until evacuation's complete, sir.

Chinese airspace has been
locked and sealed.

One mile radius.

Alright, give NEST team
the go.

Black Hawks,
clear to land.

# Ding-a-ling,
come out and get your ice cream #

Any bad robot out there
better get ready for ass-whooping.

For the last two years,
an advanced team of new Autobots

has taken refuge here
under my command.

Arcees,
get ready to launch.

We're locked and loaded.

Together, we form an alliance
with the humans.

A secret,
a brave squad of soldiers.

Alright, that's enough.

Time discovered story
in this one is toxic spill.

They had to evac the area
for search and rescue.

This makes six enemy contacts
in eight months.

We gotta make sure this one
does not get out the public axe

so keep it tight.

A classified strike team
called NEST.

We hunt for what remains
of our Decepticon foes,

hiding in different countries
around the globe.

Rolling Alpha
through Echo now.

Alright, Ironhide.

We got Echo's.
Vamos.

To the stacks.
Two o'clock.

He's here.

I smell him.

It's close.
It's heading closer.

Oh, no.

How are ya?

It's three ripple.

Alright, everybody,
be steady.

We're right on top
of it.

Ease on fire.

Hand to one.
Requesting fire mission now!

Gunships on station.
Rolling hot.

We intersected a Decepticon.

Arcee twins,
target coming your way.

Watch out!

I screwed that up.
I'm okay, I'm alright.

This is kinda bad, man.
What's wrong with you?

Three insides white.

Clear and fast.

Damn, I'm good.

Air support, we need Big Booter
delivered and dropped now.

Code 9-A...

Dropping in five, four,
three, two, one.

Autobots, I'm in pursuit.

Pull over.

Punk-ass Decepticon,

any last words?

This is not your planet
to rule.

The Fallen shall rise again.

That doesn't sound good.

Not today.

Come on, let's go.
All hands on deck.

Frankie, Mojo, out.

Come on, kiddo,

- we're on a schedule here.
- Slow down, Dad.

Why are you in such a hurry
to get rid of me, huh?

Did you
rent the room out?

No, I got other ideas
for your room

and it rhymes with
home theater.

Look what I found.
It's your little baby booties.

Oh, Ma...

Oh my little baby, booty boy,
you can't go.

You see this?

That's how
you're supposed to react

when you free your loins does not uncool
the world to pep for himself, okay?

Yeah, my heart...
Please treat it about college, bummer.

You have to come home
every holiday,

not just big ones.

You have to come home
for Halloween.

I can't come home
for Halloween, Mom.

- We'll come to you.
- No, we're not going anywhere.

- You dress up, we'll be in costumes.
- You-You can't do that.

Would you let the kid breathe,
for crying out loud?

Come on, go, pack!

There's no way
you're packed

for a month long trip.
Come on!

Time-chop.
Let's go!

March, young lady.

- Oh, oh, Dad!
- I love you when you call me

young lady,
you dirty, old man.

Nah, you ain't seen nothing yet.

- Dad, Dad, Dad, whoa!
- What?

I'm watching
what you're doing, Dad.

It's not a rap video.

Just like a coach thing,
you know.

That's a really creepy move
just now, Dad.

Look, you're the hero, uh...

Your mother and me
are really, really proud of you.

You're the first Witwiky
ever to go to college.

Now I'm crying again.
This sucks!

You're gonna be okay, Ma.

Now this is going to be, uh...

You know,
hard for her to...

accept that her boy's
all grown up, you know.

Going out to handle
the world on its own.

- You okay, Pop?
- Yeah.

Mojo, no dominating Frankie!

Get the hell of the couch,
ya filthy beasts!

Wow.

You see a lot of that
in college too.

What are you
talking about, Dad?

There's gonna be
a lot of women there.

Yeah, well, I'm
the one-woman kind of guy.

Look,
Mikaela is the greatest,

but you gotta give each other
room to grow, okay?

You're no different
than any other couple your age.

Till we discovered
an alien race together.

How long are you gonna be
riding that scooter?

[SONG: 21 Guns
BAND: Green Day]

Dad, listen,
I know what the odds are.

We're the exception,
okay?

Wait a second...

- Oh, who could that be?
- Two weeks, it could be Muffy.

Hey, beautiful.

- I'm breaking up with you, Sam.
- Really?

You sure?
I hear a lot of conviction.

Well, I am, okay?

So there's no reason for me
to come say goodbye to you.

Wow, you almost sounded
serious that time.

Guess what?

I made you a long-distance
relationship kit.

Yeah, I got you a webcam
so we can chat 24/7.

All Witwicky all the time.

I got you
a couple of souveniers

that you bet that cannot be
mentioned on cellphone.

Some mixes
and candles and stuff...

Sounds cute,
I can't wait.

Oh, hey!

You want the infamous
D-Day shirt?

You kept your nasty,
shredded clothes?

Yeah, of course
I kept it, Mikaela.

It's like my Superbowl jersey.
I bled in this thing.

Wow, you're pretty
confident, huh?

No, it's not that.

It's just that my low self-esteem's
at an all-time high.

Do you think
your little box of souveniers

is gonna keep me
from leaving you?

You really should
come with me,

they got cheap apartments
in campus.

Well,
that's not gonna happen

until I get my man child father
rushed out of prison,

back on his feet.

I heard that.

Where did you put
the clutch covers?

Next to the cam shafts.

I love it when you say cam shafts.
Whisper it to me.

Cam shafts.

God, I hate you.

It's my Witwicky charm.

Wait, hold on.
Wait, hold on a second.

I guess
we're not breaking up.

I'll be over in 20.

Mikaela...

I think this little bit Cube
got stuck on my shirt.

Sam?

Oh God!
It's a fire!

Dad, we got a fire!

Fire!

Ron, did you know
it was gonna be

- this hard?
- C-Can you just stop?

- Yeah, okay, I'll stop.
- Just wait...

- You carry this shit.
- I'll--I'll...

- Wow!
- You know what?

I don't wanna go
anywhere with you.

I don't wanna go
to France with you.

I don't wanna go
around the corner with you.

- Alright, fine.
- I'm just going back inside.

I'll call you from Paris.

What is all the racket?

- Whoa.
- Sam?

- Whoa, whoa.
- Dad...

- What was that?
- It's the whole kitchen!

Help me...
Oh my--

Bumblebee!

Oh, jeez!

Phone 9-1-1.

Bumblebee!
Get in the garage.

What the frick
is happening?

What happened
to restraint, man?

Just go in the garage,
quietly please?

Holy mother!

Oh, my God!

I--In the garage, now!

Power's out!
Get the cops out!

Come on, you guys.
What are you waiting for?

My house is on fire!

- What happened?
- Come here.

Listen, I need you
to take the Cube sliver.

Put it in your purse,
right now.

- Sam Witwicky...
- Yes, Mom.

- A word with you.
- Yeah.

- Hi, Mikaela.
- Hi.

- I have a bald spot.
- Oh.

- An old furnace, I think.
- Become a waffle iron.

When you go, he goes.

I cannot live with
this psychotic alien in my garage.

Judy, shh.

National security.

Look, if we stay quiet,
they're gonna take care of everything.

Just consider this the official start
of a remodel, okay?

Fine. If the government's paying,
I want a pool...

- and a hot tub.
- Fine. Okay.

And I'm gonna skinny-dip
and you can't say shit about it!

Yeah, you know
you're a tool.

- He's having voice problems.
- He's playing it up.

Bee, I want to talk to you
about the college thing, okay?

# I'm so excited #

Hey.

I'm not taking you
with me.

I wanna wait outside,
okay?

I wanted to tell you
about this earlier.

It's just that--
You know,

Here's the thing.

Freshmen aren't allowed
to have cars.

I know, and if it was up to me,
I'd take you with me, but it's not, Bee.

Look, you're an Autobot.

You shouldn't be living
in my dad's garage.

I mean,
you're suffocating in here.

You deserve
better than this.

This is hard enough, man,

don't make it harder.
Can you just look at me, please?

Come on, big guy.

Look, the guardian thing is done, okay?
You did your job.

Look, I'm safe now.

You need to go be with
Optimus Prime and the others.

I just want
to be normal, Bee.

That's why
I'm going to college.

I can't do that
with you.

It's not the last time
I'm gonna see you, you know, Bee.

Come on, don't do that. Bee.
You're killing me, Bee.

But you'll always be
my first car.

Love you, Bee.

Wow!

Between state farm and the taxpayers,
we're all taken care of.

- You got dirt all over you.
- Stop, stop.

- What?
- It's--I'm okay.

Well, look.

So you think
you can make it

through those East Coast
winners without me?

You're like the best thing
that ever happened to me.

And?

- And I'll do anything for you.
- And?

- I think Sam's about to say the L word.
- Let's go, kiddo.

Nice timing, Dad.

I... adore you.

That's not the word that
I wanna hear really now.

What are you
talking about?

It's the same word
as the other word.

- It's not the same word.
- Look, if I said the other word now,

you forced me to say
won't mean anything.

Plus, you haven't
said it either.

So don't get mad at me
for not saying it.

Yeah,
but I haven't said it

because guys always run
when you say it first.

Yeah, well,
so do girls.

Especially,
girls like you with options.

So this is all part
of your elaborate plan

to keep me interested?

Can be.

Ain't those working?

Have a kiss.

We'll make it work,
I promise.

[SONG: Never Say Never
BAND: The Fray]

The female has
the Cube fragment.

Soundwave acknowledges.
Pursue her.

Retrieve it.

NEST: Secret Operations,
Diego Garcia, Indian Ocean

Autobot twins,
report to Hangar Three.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Hello. What a night.
Yeah, baby, it's upgrade time.

Yes, oh, yeah. Look here.
Come on, let me call right here.

Time to get my sexy on.

# Green, I know, #

# Green is mine,
I call green #

# Be my body #

- I got the green.
- That hurt, man.

It's supposed to hurt.
It's an ass kicking.

Director Galloway,
what an honor.

Let me show you around

but you gotta be
in the classified access list.

I am now.

Presidential order, Major.

I got a message for
your classified space buddies.

You guys made a mess
at Shanghai.

Alright, so this is where
we communicate with the JCS.

And this area serves
as the Autobots' hangar.

Secured line to JCS
is up, Major.

US Military Satellite

Secured line
to the Pentagon now.

Saw the Shanghai op.
It was a rough day.

Yes, sir.

We have intel that I believe
warns an immediate debrief.

Now with your permission,
I can't let you see him

but I would like you to hear
from the leader of the Autobots.

Proceed.

You gotta wonder.

God made us in his image.
Who made him?

General, our alliance has countermanded
6 Decepticon incursions this year.

Each on
a different continent.

They're clearly searching
around the world for something.

But last night's encounter
came with a warning:

The Fallen
shall rise again.

"The Fallen."
Meaning what?

Origin: Unknown.

They only recorded

history of our race was contained
within the All-Spark,

lost with its destruction.

Excuse me!

If this so-called "All-Spark",
now destroyed,

why hasn't the enemy
left the planet

like you thought
they would?

Director Galloway,
our national security advisor

the President
just appointed him liasion.

- It's too, uh...
- Well, I guess I didn't get that memo.

Forgive the interruption, General.
Excuse me, coming through.

Excuse me,
excuse me...

After all the damage
in Shanghai,

the President is, uh...

hard-pressed to say
the job's getting done.

Now under the classified
Alien Autobot Cooperation Act,

you are agreeing
to share your intel with us,

but not your advancements
in weaponry.

We've witnessed
your human capacity for war.

It would absolutely
bring more harm than good.

But who are you
to judge what's best for us?

With all due respect,
we've been fighting side-by-side

in the field
for two years.

We've shared blood, sweat
and precious metal together.

Soldier, you're paid to shoot;
not talk.

Don't tell me.

And the, uh...

- The newest members of your team...
- Easy...

I understand they arrived here
after you sent a message into space.

An open invitation
to come to Earth,

embedded by no one
at the White House.

Let me stop you
right there, Mr. Galloway.

It was bedded
right here.

And in my experience, the judgement
of both Major Lennox and his team,

has always been
above reproach.

Well be that as it may, General,
it is the position of the President

that when our national security
is at stake,

no one
is above reproach.

Now, what do
we know so far?

We know
that the enemy leader,

classified NBE-1,
AKA Megatron,

is resting in peace

at the bottom
of the Laurentian Abyss,

surrounded by
societs detection nets

and a full-time
submarine surveillance.

We also know that

the only remaining piece
of your alien All-Spark

is locked in
an electromagnetic vault,

here on one of the most secure
naval bases in the world.

Decepticons,
we have located the shard.

And since no one...

can seem to tell me
what the enemy is now after,

well, there--there's only
one clear conclusion:

You.
The Autobots.

They're here to hunt you.

What's there to hunt for
on Earth besides that?

"The Fallen...
shall rise again"?

Sounds to me like
something's coming.

So let me ask
if we ultimately conclude

that our national security
is best served

by denying you further asylum
on our planet,

will you leave peacefully?

Freedom is your right.

If you make that request,
we will honor it.

But before your president decides,
please ask him this.

What if we leave
and you're wrong?

That's a good question.

Oh, my God,

just look at this place!

I feel smarter already.

Ron, can you smell it?

Yes, smells
like $40,000 a year.

Okay, cheapo.

Go ahead, we'll, uh...
We'll get your stuff.

Just go ahead
and check out your room.

[SONG: 21 Guns
BAND: Green Day]

- Hey.
- Hey.

You must be Sam, right?
I'm Leo.

Hey.

Uh, sorry, I already set up the crib.
Do you want this side or that side?

- That side.
- I already chose that side.

You know what this is?
This is the awkward moment.

Yeah, so you're trying to see
if I'm a normal guy.

I'm trying to see
if you're a normal guy,

balanced and medicated enough
for another coral space.

Good personal hygiene
won't stab me in my sleep.

Good criminal record
won't steal anything.

- Including girlfriends.
- Especially girlfriends.

- You got a girlfriend?
- I do.

- You?
- No, not a chance.

- You're a techie?
- Hmm.

Sweet.

- Sharsky, Fassbiner, where we at?
- Server's almost online, Leo.

It works up and running.

Beautiful; that's what
I like to hear.

- That's Sharsky, that's Spastik,
- Hey, dude.

my I.T. gurus.

Welcome to my empire, bro.
TheRealEffinDeal.com.

That's me,
I'm sure you've heard of it.

- No, I haven't.
- Well, that sucks.

- What is all this for?
- See, look...

Call me gross,
I wanna be a baby billionaire.

Kitten calendars.

It's where it started.
Look at me now.

Got our dreams, bro.

Leo, we got some
bad news in Shanghai.

Post it, baby. Go, go, go!
FTJ, FTJ!

- It's clean.
- What's FTJ?

- Fuel the Jet, Fuel the Jet.
- FTJ, FTJ.

- This is it. Did you see that?
- Wow. Okay, this half of Shanghai

gets rigged
when China says gas leak.

Don't believe the hype, bro.

Just like the alien robots in LA
two years ago that everyone covered up.

Yeah, I saw these robots
and they did this, like,

firing thing and they came down
and twisted this woman

- and she was like--
- Looks fake to me.

Dude, it's not fake.
The Internet's pure true.

- Neither does it lie.
- It looks fake.

No, man, I've seen them.
They are like these, uh, robots...

Look, look, look, it's fake.
Anybody can do on any computer, okay?

And I wasn't, uh... there.

So I can't comment
or speculate.

- Oh, no.
- "Comment and speculate"?

We're supposed
to go habitate?

No, listen, okay.
Don't be sucking the sack, bro.

- Whose sack?
- Look, the ball sack.

- Dude, what kind of tool are you?
- Mainstream media sack.

They're lying to us,
alright.

- It's aliens, man.
- Okay, okay.

Follow me.

Uh-oh. Uh, Leo.
Bad news, we just got scooped.

The video's already up
on GeoBoard.

Damn...
No!

Robo-Warrior has a main competition,
our conspiracy step.

Effing was my effing idea.
He stole it.

He's been looking to my site
and thieving hits for ever!

By the way,
I read your file.

I'll pour, you'll pour...
We're gonna fix that, alright?

You work for me, now.

I work for you now?

That's incredible.
It's first day of college,

I got a career,
a dinky internet firm,

with a boss who is made up
of just pure champion stuff.

You're mocking
my life's work, Samuel? Huh?

That's your one warning
patrolling, dude.

Don't make me that fast....
'cause I'll do it.

Hey alright, listen. It's getting
a little intense in my room.

- Can I switch now?
- Oh, sad face, 3-12.

No switching, no treating.
Let's turn that upside-down, okay?

- Oh, here we go.
- Hey, hi.

It's just like Hogwarts.
Hi!

Is this co-ed?
This is a co-ed dorm.

Do you guys want
to meet my roommates?

- Yeah.
- 'Cause they're real swell guys.

- Here is Leo.
- We're the Witwicky.

- I'm Leo.
- I'm Judy.

Hey, you have a great son.
You really do.

Oh, well aren't you
the sweetest thing?

He's real sweet, Ma.

What is that in your hand,
by the way?

Oh, I got this at the bake sale
for the environment

that those boys
were having.

You know, you don't often
see white boys

with the dreadlocks.

- Mom.
- Yeah, it's a 100 percent pure Hawaiian

- green for the environment.
- Jud--Can you please drop it?

Yeah, then they baked it
with reefer in it.

- No, it's canna-- Hey!
- Please give me.

Hey! It's my cheap day.
I can eat whatever I want.

Please God, I'm gonna freak out.
Please do something right now, Dad.

- Please do something right now.
- Okay, okay.

Out of my way,
you wild hair!

I can eat all the freaking
brownies I want!

Sorry, fellas.

I'm sorry and
you're welcome.

We call it the Hot Freshmen 55.

Sharsky hacked campus house and
stacked the dorm with pretty beddies.

Oh, my God.
It's her.

She's coming.
She sees me, she sees me.

She's tight for me on one
on my to-do list.

Do not bird-dog
my credit, you hear me?

Pretty girls.

Hey, you.
My son lives in this dorm.

You should go
make friends with him,

- he's bad.
- Bless she ain't my mama.

And he recently
had his cherry popped.

He didn't know
I was in the house.

- I heard it all.
- Hey, hey, hey.

There he is!

Oh, will you give him
my closet?

Hey, and his car
is a talking robot!

No, like a... like a GPS,
All-Star.

- Okay.
- All-Star.

Frisbee. Whoo!

No, Dad.

Dad, you're just gonna
let her run around school.

- Are you alright?
- Whoa.

Give me.

Are you crazy?

Judy, Judy.
Just--Just put it. Just put it.

You gotta control
your mother.

I wasn't doing this.

Hey, Professor.
I'd do anything for an A.

Alright, Grace...

Looks like we got
some snacks in the car. Let's go.

- Whoo!
- Did you gt the booties?

Yes, Dad,
I got the booties!

- Alright, alright.
- Oh my God, I'm upside-down!

Black Light in X-Trait.
This is Black Light in Tango.

Breach in B-14.

Go, go, go,
go, go!

The Shard is gone.

Take him down!

- Open fire.
- Get down!

The first frat party's
the game change of boys,

we're hunting in the wild now,
so get your game faces on.

I can't stay long,
I have a webcam date with my girlfriend.

- That's so cool.
- No, it's not.

[SONG: Burning Down The House
BAND: The Used]

While he's making up
with his MacBook,

I'm gonna be dating
my spitzy, freaky freak on.

- Let's roll.
- She's hot.

We're, uh...
We're hunting.

- See you, darling.
- Bye, Dad.

Okay.

This is our first live chat date.
Never done it before.

I'm kind of nervous.

- Are you okay?
- No, uh...

I was getting a napkin
for my drink.

Thanks. Cheers!

- You're Sam, right?
- Yeah.

I wanna dance.

Like--Like dancing?

Like a pairing?
Like a duo, like a coupling?

'Cause I'm in
a permanently, semi--

- I'm in a relationship, kind of.
- Oh, relax.

I just want to have
some fun.

Oh, just some fun?
Oh yeah, okay.

Let's play some checkers.
You can sit over there, and, uh...

- Oh my God.
- So how about tonight,

you pretend I'm your girlfriend
and I pretend that you're my boyfriend.

Hey! Who broke the
frickin' yellow Camaro?

Huh?
There's a car on the run.

[SONG: Burn It To The Ground
BAND: Nickleback]

What are you doing?

Houston,
we have a problem.

- What is it?
- Freshman!

- Yeah.
- Is that your car on our bushes?

No, there's a friend of mine
who just went to a...

who went to get you
a tighter shirt.

There isn't a tighter shirt.
We checked.

Now how about
I park my foot in your ass?

What size shoe
do you wear?

- Yeah, oh, you ain't--
- Hold on, hold-- Whoa!

Are you--Are you trying?

I'm gonna back it up
right now.

Get it out of here.

You have a ride?

Bro, why you holding
onto us?

I've only known you
17 hours.

This is gonna really
change our lives.

You have no idea.

I love Camaros.

- I can't do this right now, okay?
- Don't be a wimp.

Oh, God.

- My first car was my Dad's money 2Z-28.
- Yeah?

Fuel-injected.

The roar of the engine.
It just, tickles me.

We shouldn't, uh, stare...
I mean, share stories...

to each other
at all.

What're you becoming, Sam?
Just one ride...

[SONG: Your Cheatin' Heart
ARTIST: Frank Williams]

[SONG: The Jaws Theme
COMPOSER: John Williams]

Don't. Don't.

[SONG: Super Freak
ARTIST: Rick James]

Is your radio broke?

- No, my car's iteration is.
- We're not cheating.

Not yet.

Something wrong here?

Ow! Oh, God!
You okay?

I really don't know
what to tell you,

this car--
It just has a lot of problems.

A lot of prob--

Oh, God.
Oh, it's in my mouth. Oh...

Are you okay?

I got wetnaps.
I got wetnaps for your face.

Hold on.

I'm so sorry!

What are you doing?

You won't give me
a day, huh?

- You won't give me one day in college.
- I'm sorry, Sam.

But the last fragment
of the All-Spark was stolen.

Like what?
Like Decepticon-stolen?

We placed it under human protection
at your government's request.

But I'm here
for your help, Sam.

Because your leaders believed
we brought vengeance upon your planet.

Perhaps,
they are right.

That is why they must be
reminded by another human

of the trust we share.

- This isn't my war.
- Not yet.

But I fear
it soon will be.

Your world must not share
the same fate as Cybertron.

Whole generations lost.

I know and I-I want
to help you. I do.

But I'm not
some alien ambassador.

You know, I'm a normal kid
with normal problems.

I am where
I'm supposed to be.

I'm sorry, I--

I really am.

Sam, fate rarely calls upon us
at a moment of our choosing.

You're Optimus Prime.
You don't need me.

We do...
more than you know.

North Atlantic,
07:13 AM

USS Topeka SSN-754

New contact, bearing 214
and possible hostile

confirmed for
Project Beat Six drop-point.

- What you got?
- Sue, pull five contacts.

5,000 feet. Diving fast.

There's something.
They dive that deep, that fast.

- Man battle stations.
- Sealer One, man battle stations.

Hell, not pull the rudder
or head two-thirds.

Dive, Cookie.

The NEST protecting NBE-1
are screening, sir.

That is 9,300 fathoms down.

- And no confirmed DSRVs on sight?
- None, sir.

Then, people,
we've got a problem.

Kill such little one.

Sea shard, make Energon.

Prime sonar now holds six contacts
and they're coming up fast.

Man collisional arm...

...are 500 feet.

Let's get out of here.

Angel Six,

we got six hostiles
coming down.

- Collision imminent. Portside--
- 100 feet.

Brace for impact.

Starscream, I'm home.

Behold, Megatron,
I was so relieved

to hear of your...
resurrection.

You left me to die,
you pathetic insect!

Only to help
spawn our new army,

the Fallen decreased it,
after all, in your absence,

someone had
to take command.

You...

are so disappointing.

Even in death,
there's no command but mine.

My master,
I failed you on Earth.

The All-Spark is destroyed,

and without it,
our race will perish.

You have much to learn,
my disciple.

The Cube
is merely a vessel.

It's power, it's knowledge
can never be destroyed.

It can only transform.

- How is that possible?
- It has been absorbed

by the human child.

The key to saving our race
now lies within his mind.

Well then, let me strip
the very flesh from his body.

And you will,
my apprentice.

In time. For millenia,
I have dreamed of my return

to that wretched planet,
where I too was once betrayed,

by the Primes
I call my brothers.

Only a Prime can defeat me,
and now only one remains.

Optimus.
He protects the boy.

Then the boy
will lead us to him

- and revenge will be ours.
- Yes.

The boy will not escape us.
We have him in our sights.

Without more Energon,
hatchlings will keep dying.

Space, time, gravity.

- Thank you.
- Finish that for me.

We're going
on a journey together,

you and I, today.

All you, eager nubile young minds
on the very cusp of adulthood.

And I shall be your consort,
your guide,

your chaperone,
into the heart of darkness.

Welcome to Astronomy 101.

For what do we know
about the stars?

Virgo... the virgin.

Orion, the great hunter.

These are no mere
twinkling diamonds

for lovely maidens
to wish upon.

No, they are diamond,
filled with a throbbing,

savage and hemped-up energy.

Behold the work of
Albert Einstein,

a professor once,
like moi,

- energy, in its mass temp--
- What are you doing?

Put your hand down,
put your hand down.

Young man,
there are no questions

until I've reached
the climax of my lecture.

I've just finished your book.
There's only one problem.

Einstein's wrong.

Energy doesn't go
mass times velocity light square

in this dimension.
What about the other 17

while we're impossible
to give 17?

A clear example:

Come on, guys,
I can't be the only one in class--

Young man, I will not be punked
in front of the dean.

No, this is my universe here.
Do you understand?

I am the Alpha
and the Omega.

- Get out of my class.
- Yes, sir.

Any one else care to have
some sort of mental breakdown?

Hi, Bones.
Hi!

Hi! Oh yes,
that's a good boy.

Oh, what a good boy,
you are.

Hey, Bones.

You hungry?

Here you go.

- Yes, Samuel.
- Hello? Mikaela.

I can't believe you're gonna
stand me up on our first web chat date.

Something just happened
to me, okay?

- Wait, you finally hit puberty?
- No, no, no,

Stop laughing.
This is serious.

Okay, remember
I was telling you about

my great-great-grandfather,
Archibald Witwicky?

Do you remember?

Watch where you're
supposed to go!

Okay, remember
I was telling you about, okay...

Can you stop...
Watch the foot! Watch your foot!

Mikaela, okay, my great-great-grandfather
went to this Arctic mission, right?

And he saw Megatron,
Megatron zapped him

and he started seeing
these crazy symbols, okay.

Well, now I'm seeing them too.
Excuse me.

I just wrote a 903-page
Astronomy book at 32.6 seconds

and had a meltdown
in the middle of my class.

I am seeing symbols
ever since I--

- Since what?
- Ever since I touched the Cube sliver.

Do you have it?

No, how about it's in
the shop safe? It's fine.

Mi--Mikaela, do not touch it, okay?
Don't touch it.

I'm not gonna touch it,

Sam, it's fine. It's locked away,
no one knows where it is.

But I do.

You're hot,
but you're ain't too bright.

There we go.

Oh, big son of a bitch!

What are you looking at,
Slobberpuss?

Ah, what the--

This is a fricking
House of Horrors.

Hold on.

Is that the best
you got, huh?

Is that the best
you can do?

What are you doing here,
you little freak?

Ow, that's my eye,
you crazy bitch!

You gotta talk now?

I... I seek knowledge of the Cube.
The Fallen demands me.

What knowledge?

You got the shot, I need the shot,
give me the shot, I need the shot.

Give me the shot,
they're gonna whack me,

I'm gonna be dead
without that shot.

Easy Warrior Goddess,
I'm just a little salvage scrap drone.

- Then I'm your worst nightmare.
- Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Hey, hey!

- What the hell was that?
- I'll tell you later,

just not on
open phone line, okay?

I'm gonna get on a plane right now.
I'll be there later this afternoon.

Just be careful, Sam.

And have any stranger giving you
anything suspicious to carry on today?

Yeah, a large box!

- No.
- Good.

Major, incoming SOS
from Autobots.

Multiple Decepticon contacts in motion.
Vicinity eastern United States, sir.

- Hansvin, how many?
- Unclear, sir.

Well, get clear.

Autobots on the move.
Splitting them into two teams, sir.

Unarching their course, somewhere heading
to New York and Philadelphia.

Full weapons deployment.
Wheels up in 20 minutes!

Flight Chairman
throughout West Beverly Hills.

M'amor (my lover), can I interest you
in Mayteam Zookeeper's Special?

Extra large supertees
with every known animal as a topping.

Basic lengths.
Only 18 inches of meat.

Oh, so you're a vegetarian.
Alright, it's cool. I am too.

Is Sam home?

Sam... I think he died but,
why don't we check?

- Here we are.
- Hey.

Have you had
a song stuck in yours?

It's like the worst song ever,
but you can't help

whistle it or sing it.
It's like, repeats itself,

repeats itself, repeats itself,
repeats itself, repeats itself,

repeats itself...
Kitten calendar, kitten calendar,

- kitten calendar, kitten calendar,
- Dude,

- kitten calendar, kitten calendar,
- What the F?

I know you're freaking out.
Don't freak out, don't freak out.

Easy fix. Puzzle, code, in my head.
Now it's on the walls.

Everything is good.

This is the part that--

Okay,
what were you saying?

Alice, I'm horrified you had
to see this. Let's go.

- Get out.
- What?

Wait, wait, wait.
C-Can I just sit and watch?

I-I'll eat my pizza quietly.

Sam, I knew there were
something special about you.

Really?

And I know you know
what happens

when two people
in the room get together...

they're genuinely amazing...
in bed.

- Thank you.
- No problem.

Alright, listen, hold on.
Boundaries. Flight on the plane.

Okay, I'm very ticklish.

- You have the need, Sam. Relax!
- Why?

Oh, jeez!

Uh, what about this economy?
It's crazy, isn't it?

- You are very aggressive.
- Just relax.

You want
some jerky meatloaf?

Sam?

S u B Z ~ V e R d i K T
[Kept to prevent duplicate files]

Mikaela.

Is that your girlfriend?

Ex.

Mikaela, wait...
I can explain every--

Sam, your bed-buddy, Alice.

What--

- It's coming!
- This is an alien robot.

- You gotta move. Just run.
- They're real?

Oh my God, I can't believe
I once had sex with her in my dream.

I can tell that you really
missed me a lot, Sam.

Look, it's not my fault, okay?

Listen, listen.
I'm a victim.

Oh, you were a victim?
Of what?

- Of what? A little 80-pound girl--
- Of--Of...

It's like getting humped
in the neck by a mountain ox.

You didn't have to put
your tongue in her mouth.

- I didn't.
- You did.

Look, you ever had your stomach tounged
by a mountain ox with a 5-foot tong?

It's not fun for me,
okay, Mikaela.

And it smelled like--like diesel.
Like a diesel he dinged to it.

You're such a little girl.

You have ten seconds
of silence, right now.

I'm not talking to you
for ten seconds.

No, you can't give me the silence.
You know what?

I'm not talking to you for ten seconds.
You have three seconds left.

You know, what?
You can give me the silence you want,

all you want but you can't
give me the talking...

W-What were you gonna say?

I hope you had a lot of fun
because this--

This is over!

Did she finally led you
to orbits?

You threw a broom?
She did it, she went in it?

...gestating in that inside of you.
You're going right now, bro.

You need to vomit right now.
Yak it, yak it.

- Right now!
- Who are you?

I am the only one who
everybody can spit, okay?

I'm the key to this.

Aliens; they want me
because of my site.

Whoa!

Run!

Mikaela!

Watch out.
We get in.

It's a bomb!

We gotta get
that box.

This way.

Hey, let me out,
let me out!

Oh my God,
you know to hot-wire a car?

- That's so hot.
- Drive, drive, drive.

She went there,
she went there!

W-wait!

They can....

Cut, cut, cut.

Oh God!

Kiss this, bitch.

Drive, drive, drive,
drive, drive, drive.

Okay, so what else's
going right now, alright,

did you guys just mess
with the minor details?

Thing you saw back there.
That was a little babe.

Whoa!
Oh my God! Oh my God!

Sam!

- Sam!
- Hold on!

Hold on.

Sam!

I don't want to die!
We're going to die! Oh my God!

Oh, Jesus!
Oh, jeez!

Come here, boy.

Closer.

Okay.

- You remember me, don't you?
- I did what you said, okay?

- Just don't hurt us.
- Shut up!

Sam!

It feels good
to grab your first.

I am going to kill you,
slowly, painfully.

But first, we have
some delicate work to do.

I could snap your ribs off.

Doctor, examine
this alien specimen.

Sick of your face now.

Go that way.

A wormy that's crabby--

- Oh, there they are.
- That's what I'm seeing in my head.

These symbols can lead us
to the Energon source.

We must tear the brain!

Brain?
What does he mean by my brain?

Well, you have something
on your mind.

- Something I need.
- Hold on. I know you're pissed.

I know you're pissed.

Because I tried to kill you
and it's completely understandable.

Somebody tried to kill me,
I'd be upset too.

I think that
we have an opportunity here

to start a new and--and
develop our relationship,

and--and,
see where it leads us, okay?

So you just call
doctor inspection,

I'll let you talk
in five seconds.

W-Wait...

Go, go.

Go, go, go.

Sam!

Go, go, go, go!

Here he comes!

Hide, Sam!
Hide.

Weak.

Puny.

Voiced-up.

Junkyard drone.

Decepticons!

Come here, boy.

There is another source of Energon
hidden on this planet.

The boy can lead us to it.

Optimus!

Is the future of our race
not worth a single human life?

Op, get up!

You'll never stop at one.

I'll take you all alive.

Sam, where are you?

You are so weak.

At last, Prime is dead.

Sam, run.

Autobots, attack!

Bumblebee,
get them out of here.

This is Lennox.

That went well.

Lost the boy, Master.

The Autobots must be shielding
the signals.

- I can't even rely on you.
- Sorry. No.

What a simple insect!

- What insect amongst severed billion--
- Shut up.

It could be anywhere.

Then we will force them
to find him for us.

It's time for the world
to know of our presence.

No more disguises,
no mercy!

Time has come
for my master's arrival.

Decepticons, mobilise.

It is time.

Oh, that single's good!

Speaking French
is so exciting.

Oh God,
who is this?

Hello-- I mean,
uh, bon--bonswa (good afternoon)!

What?
Who is this?

Oh, for Pete's sakes.

I'm not impressed
with your perverted mouth breathing.

New York City

Oh, jeez.

You are invading my space.
I'm gonna have to drop you.

Would you get out
of here?

Might freak me out.

We're gonna try
new things.

Looks like Candian goosepoop.

It's nasty.

US Fleet 2, North Atlantic

That's fine, 1-2-5.

Revenge is mine.

Pentagon,
Washington D.C.

...port accident
for a terrorist attack, or worse.

Negative.
NORAD confirmed

project came
from beyond our atmosphere

inbound at 30,000 knot.

Citizens
of the human hive,

your leaders
have withheld the truth.

You are not alone
in this universe.

We have lived among you,
hidden...

but no more.

As you've seen,

we can destroy
your cities at will.

Unless you turn over
this boy.

If you resist us,

we will destroy the world,
as you know it.

What we're hearing from
the German government is that

the world broadcast
is a satellite hacking.

- NEST Team, New Jersey
- The military has just told us

they have assumed
Condition Delta,

which is the highest level
we've been at since 9/11.

President Obama
is being flown to a bunker,

somewhere in the middle
of the United States.

in the phase of the worst
simultaneous attacks ever

around the globe.

The aircraft carrier, USS Roosevelt,
goes down off the East Coast

all hands lost.

Worldwide casualties
are in the neighbourhood of 7,000,

but that number
could implode.

It's still too early to tell.

What we need to ask now,
is who and why.

The FBI is still trying
to locate the boy, Sam Witwicky.

Within deep, they have information
about this.

The FBI, CIA and Interpol

are all seeking the cooperation
of worldwide law enforcements.

Hey bro, you need
to listen to this, man.

- You gotta check this out.
- Once they have a traffic camera

- spotting a Sam Witwicky.
- They have a picture of me, man.

We're dead, bro.
FBI, CIA, we're wanted fugitives now.

I just need you to focus
just one minute, man.

This thing is blowing
to a whole another level, alright.

- You know one thing--
- Remove this thing.

They can track us.
Do you see this?

What?

They can track us?

Like satellite-track us?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay,
I'm not even with you guys.

Technically, I'm like a hostage.
This is kidnapping. Enough--

Yo, Leo!

This thing's gonna give me
a heart attack, I swear.

- That's 'cause you was a wuss.
- You did force me into the car, right?

- So...
- Oh, I think you scared.

Hey, Mudflap.

What are we going to do
with this shrimp taco?

Just pop a cap in his ass,
throw him in the trunk

and nobody gonna know nothing,
y'know I mean?

- Wait, now my trunk--
- Yo, bumper cars,

Check it out.
I'm hearing you, okay?

I'm right here
and I can hear you.

No one's popping any caps
in any asses, okay?

I've had a hell of a day.

Why don't you get a haircut
with your bitch ass?

Go whine
to your boyfriend.

Listen Sam, I know
what I'm gonna do, man.

Look, I'm just going to go
to the authorities

and tell them the truth.
Like I had nothing to do with this,

- I'm an accomplice.
- Hey, hey!

You wanted this, right?
You wanted the real deal?

'Cause that's what this is.
Wake up! You're in the middle of it.

You wanna run, go ahead,
no one's stopping you.

Stop complaining.

What is the meaning
of this?

You dare
point your gun at me?

You want a piece of me?
I will tear you apart!

Drop your weapons!
Drop your weapons!

- Tell them to lower the weapons.
- Tell them first.

- Tell them to lower the weapons!
- Major, there's nothing I can do.

Talk to him.

US teams deactivated, Major.

You are decease
anti-Decepticon operations,

and return to Diego Garcia.
Any further orders?

No. We take our orders
direct from Chairman Morshower.

Well, I'll see your chairman
and the Joint Chiefs of Staff

but I will raise you
a President of the United States.

I have operational command now.

An alien blood feud
has been brought to our shores

for which our soldiers
are paying the price.

The secret is out.
This is our war now.

And we will win it
as we always have,

with a coordinated
military strategy.

This fool
is terribly misinformed.

You're gonna get every assets
that you've got.

What we need is
to draw our battle plans.

What we explore every possible,
diplomatic solution.

Like what:
Handing over the kid?

All options
are being considered.

Whatever the Decepticons
are after,

this is just the start.

Wait, there is no negotiating
with them.

I'm ordering you
to stand down.

You won't be needing this
any more.

Get your assets
back to base.

Take that scrap metal
back to Diego Garcia.

Let's go.

I really don't
like that dude.

He's a asshole.

Autobots,
report to hangar for transport.

Ironhide,
we should leave this planet.

That's not what
Optimus would want.

There's nothing
that you could have done.

- You okay?
- Yeah.

Bee, if you hate me,
I understand.

I messed up.

I'm sorry.

- Young fella, you are...
- ...person I care about most in my life.

- If there's anything you need...
- I won't be far away.

He's dead
because of me.

He came in
to protect me instead.

There's some things
you just can't change.

So this sacrifice was...

will not have been in vain,
hallelujah!

We make it right
when we turn myself in.

But we,
we've got to stick together.

You're not gonna do that.

Yes, I am.

Everything we worked for
will be wiped out.

In one day.

- You two.
- Huh?

Hey, you know the glyphs?

The symbols that have been
rattling around in my head.

That's old school, yo.

That's like--
That's Cybertonian.

Oh, that's some
serious stuff in there.

They gotta mean something,
like a message...

or, like a--
like a map!

Like a map
to an Energon source.

Can you read this?

- Read? Nah.
- You see that?

No, we--we don't really do
much reading.

- Not so much.
- Well if you can't read it,

we gotta find
somebody who can.

Oh, look, who came
stashing and back.

Hair grown like a chip,
there, look it.

I had a bit of a mild
panic attack earlier, alright?

That's 'cause
you're a pussy.

I think I'm allowed that
considering what I've been through

and... I heard
you have a problem.

I think I know someone
who can help.

- Who?
- Robo-Warrior.

[SONG: New Divide
BAND: Linkin Park]

This guy, Robo-Warrior...

Everything about anything alien,
he's supposed to know.

One time
we hacked this site

and maybe, I saw some of your, uh...
alien drawings or whatever.

This is it.

Yep, deli. Good front.

Alright, wait here.
I'll give you the go/no go, alright?

- Number 42, we got your--
- ...in the frying and then smoke it.

Ma, you want me
to cut my handle off or what?

- You order a terrible piece of fishing.
- I'm like a ninja, with a blade.

Get out of here!

Hey, Sam!
Watch your reach, huh?

Take a number,
young man.

Robo-Warrior.

Know him?

I never heard of him.

You never heard of
TheRealEffingDeal.com?

You must be talking about
that amateur blog operation

with GameBoy level security.

Robo-Warrior.

It's him. It's him!
That's the guy right there.

That's him.

No.

You gotta be kidding me.

Alright, meat store's closed.
Everybody out!

Go, right now!

Wait a minute,
you know this guy?

- We're old friends.
- Whoa, friend,

you are the case
that shut down Sector 7.

Got the tie-bash
disbandment,

no more security clearance,
no retirement, no nothing.

All 'cause of you,
and your little criminal girlfriend.

Look at her now,
so mature.

Moron, where's the wifresh?

Don't catch me
with the thing.

- Yakov!
- What?

You don't get Christmas bonus
just standing around.

You want those new teeth
you saw in SkyMall?

- It's my dream.
- Help around.

- You live with your momma?
- No, my momma lives with me,

it's a big difference.

They got your face
all over the news, alien boy.

- Yeah, I know.
- And NBE-1, still kicking, huh?

How did that happen?

Don't answer.
I don't know what you're hiding,

but I don't want anything
to do with it

so, goodbye, you never saw me.
I got bagels to schmidt.

Well, give me 5 seconds.

Look, hold on,
I need your help.

Really,
you need my help?

I need--

Look, I am slowly
losing my mind, okay?

I had a little Crabbot,
placed the device

deep into the soft tissues
of my brain,

and started projecting
little alien symbols

like a whole freaking movie

and on top of that,
I'm a wanted fugitive.

So you think
you got it rough?

You said it projected images
of your brain?

Right.

Meat locker, now!

- Dead pigs.
- Yuck.

What you're about to see
is top secret.

Do not tell my mother.

Dead pigs, swine flu.

- Not good.
- Now you know.

Next time, you eat
a goat or a pig.

There's a story
behind this.

Yeah,
there's a story.

...you're saying
you believe in aliens?

Okay, files, files.

We're talking about symbols.

Hey! Still radioactive.
Hands off.

Okay, Cube-brain.

Any of these look like
the symbols you saw?

Where did you get these?

Before I got fired.

I coached S-7's
scrawny, drooly...

75 years of alien research
which points to one inescapable fact:

The Transformers;
they've been here a long, long time.

How do I know?

Archaeologists found
these unexplained markings

and ancient runes
all over the world.

China, Egypt, Greece.

Shot at 1932.

These the symbols
you're seeing in your head?

- Yeah.
- Same ones over here, right?

So, tell me, how did they end up
all drawing the same thing?

Aliens.

And I think
some of them stayed.

Check this out.

Project Black Knife.

Robots, in disguise.
Hiding here.

All along.

We detected radioactive signatures
all across the country.

I pleaded on my knees
with S-7 to investigate it

but they said
the readings were infantesimal.

That I was obsessed!

Me, can you imagine that?

Megatron said that there was
another Energon source here.

- On Earth? On another source?
- On Earth.

Okay,
and that these symbols,

the maps in my head
would lead him there.

Should you talk
to your Autobot friends?

No, no, no,
the source is before.

Whatever the Energon source is,
it predates them. It's before them.

- So it comes before that.
- Correct.

Well then, report...

Unless we can talk
to a Decepticon.

I mean, I'm not on
speed terms or whatever...

Actually, I am.

Let me out!

- It could be a little bit sad.
- Open it.

I'm gonna so many Decepticons
on your butt!

Behave.

- What is it, a Decepticon?
- Yeah.

- Can you train him?
- Tried to.

I spent my whole adult life,
coming a plan of aliens.

- You're very furious--
- And you're carrying it around

what are you supposed to make
a little chihuahua.

Wanna throw it down,
you pubic fro-head?

I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry about your eye.

You know,
but if you're a good boy,

then I'm not gonna torch
your other eye.

Okay?
I'm not gonna torch it.

Just tell me
what these symbols are.

Please.

Okay.

Oh, I know that.
That's the language of the Primes.

I don't read it, but uh,
these guys...

Where the frick did you find
photos of these guys?

- Is this them?
- Yeah.

Sakers, pal.
Oldest of the old.

Oh, they've been here for
thousands of years,

looking for something.

I don't know what,
nobody tells me nothing.

Oh, they'll translate
those symbols for ya.

And I know
where to find them.

Show us.

Closest one's
in Washington.

Smithsonian
Air and Space Museum.

Land of dreams
in there.

All I ever want to be
was an astronaut.

- Hold those.
- What is that?

What?

I wear them
when I'm in the funk.

So does Jeamby, Cheater.
It's a baseball thing.

Okay. Once you synchronize,
shop-mind and empty bladder

you get caught, demand an attorney
and don't ever say my name.

Here, take one
of these pills.

Slip it
under your tongue,

it's a high-concentrate polymer
they put in Oreo cookies.

Fools the polygraph,
everytime.

Okay, now let's get this show
on the road.

Whoa, no, listen.
I can't do this.

I'm not some
alien bounty hunter, alright?

'cause I'm not gonna do this.
Guards have guns,

- I don't want to die.
- Kid, kid, kid, kid, kid, kid.

You compromise this mission,
you are dead to me.

Now look into my eyes,
and tighten up that spare tank.

The museum
is now closing.

Papa, bad news, bro.

Ran out of toilet paper,
you got any out here?

- Please tell me you--
- Sir, I suggest you get in there.

The museum is closed.

Listen man, I understand that,
but as you can see, this is important.

Dumper-dumper.
I gotta go, alright?

Sir, you are a grown naked man
around showing...

- Pull your pants up and exit--
- I'm not going anywhere.

You got that paper,
right, sir?

You should be embarassed.

This a family museum, sir.

What is going on here?

How many times
can you get tased in the nuts?

So you covered the gates,
huh, you know.

You're an amateur man,
a rank amateur.

There's now five guards.
Five guards.

- You get this stuff and get out of here.
- Give me a second.

I gotta get
the tracker, alright.

- Be good.
- I'm claustrophobic.

Look, look.
Follow him, follow him.

He knows
where he's going.

- He knows something.
- What?

He knows something!

- You got what I got?
- Yeah.

Blackbird.

There he is.

This guy's a legend,
like--like the Chairman of the Board.

Yo, freshman,
put the shard.

And watch
the magic happen.

Oh shit,
it's a Decepticon!

- Decepticon?
- What is it?

Find the main tail!

What sort of hideous
mosalleem is this?

Semi pulls and days,
show yourselves!

Or suffer my infinite wrath!

W-wait, old spinal called
based organisms.

Bugger!

Behold the eternal glory
of Jetfire!

Prepare
for a systems' override.

I tell you, this guy
did not age well.

- He either heard it.
- Command these doors to open.

Fire!

Oh, I said, fire!

Bollocks.

Break that,
these worthless--

Wait a second.

Itching, wretching,
rust in my arse.

Oh, the museum's gonna be
very angry.

Very angry.
We gotta catch that plane!

I'm on a mission.

- W-wait, wait!
- Wait, wait, wait.

- Hey!
- What do you want?

Look,
we just want to talk!

I've no time to talk,
I'm on a mission!

I'm a mercenary goon-bringer.

- What planet am I on?
- Earth.

Earth?
Terrible name for a planet,

might as well
call it "dirt".

Planet dirt.

Tell me, is that robot civil war
still going on?

- Who's winning?
- The Decepticons.

Well, I changed sides
to the Autobots.

What do you mean,
"changed sides"?

It's a choice.

It's intensely personal decision.
So much negativity.

Who wants to live a life
filled with hate?

Meaning you don't have
to work for those

miserable,
freaking Decepticons?

If they set on their way,
they destroy the whole Universe.

I'm changing sides,
I'm changing sides, Warrior Goddess!

- Who's your little Autobot?
- Oh you cutes.

Name's Wheelie.

Say my name,
say my name!

What are you allowing
to happen to your foot just now?

At least he's faithful, Sam.

Yeah, well, he's faithful,
and he's nude and he's perverted.

Can you just--
Can you stop?

- Hey, what are you doing?
- ...I don't wanna argue it.

What were you saying?

I told you
my name was Jetfire!

Wow, someone shit in the bed
this morning?

Pretty stout
with my mother.

My ancestors have been here
for centuries.

My father, one was a wheel!
The first wheel!

- Do you know what he transformed into?
- No.

Nothing!
But he did so with honor, dignity and--

My boosters are fried.

I thought
we could help each other.

You know things I don't know.
I know things you don't know.

- I do.
- I don't think he knows anything.

Honestly, I don't know.

These vivid symbols,

they're symbols
but they are in my mind.

You see,
all this is in my mind.

And Megatron
wants what's in my mind.

Him and someone called
the Fallen.

The Fallen? I know him.
He left me here to rust.

The original Decepticon.

He's terrible to work for.
He's always apocalypse, chaos...

His suspects,
they were a part of my mission

the Fall and Search,
I remember now.

Of a dagger's tip
and the key!

Slow down.
The dagger's tip, the key,

- what are you talking about?
- No time to explain.

Hold on, everybody!

Well, that wasn't so bad.

I was overseeing
the wrong planet.

Hey, that frickin' hurt!

Oh, my God!

Oh, God!

Oh, my God! You beautiful face,
this will be a perfect moment.

Except you landed
on my testicles.

Please get off!

My balls!

Sam!

- Where are we? Simmons!
- Hey! Yeah!

Oh, my God.

What is this?
It's Vegas!

- You guys okay?
- Yeah!

Hey! I think
we're in Vegas!

That really, really hurts.

You're just lucky
that I didn't get hurt.

People could've gotten killed, okay?
And if I would have gotten hurt,

- you would have heard from--
- Oh, shut up!

I told you
I was opening the space bridge.

It's the fastest way
to travel to Egypt.

What did you tell us?
You didn't tell us anything!

You didn't tell us anything.
Why are we in Egypt?

Don't you dare
slip in with me, fleshwing.

- You would do the informed.
- Can you just stop for a second?

Can you focus?
Can you tell us why we're in Egypt

so we can all have a little bit
assemblance and peace of mind?

This planet was visited
by our race once before

by our earliest ancestors
a millenium ago.

They were on an exploratory mission
to harvest Energon,

the life blood
of our race.

Without it, we'll all perish,
oxidize and rust,

let my wretched self.

Do you have any idea what is
like a slowly fall of parton die?

Let's not get episodic, okay?
Old-timer.

Beginning, middle, end.
Facts, details, condense, plot, tell it.

Somewhere buried in this desert,
our ancestors built a great machine.

It harvests Energon
by destroying suns.

- Destroy suns?
- You mean blow them up?

Yes. You see, in the beginning,
there were seven Primes,

our original leaders.

And they set out in the Universe
seeking distant suns to harvest.

The Primes set out
with one rule:

Never destroy a planet
with life.

Until one of them
tried to defy this rule.

And his name, for ever more,
was the Fallen.

He despised
the human race.

And he wanted to kill you all
by turning on that machine.

The only way to activate it
is with a legendary key

called the Matrix of Leadership.

A great battle took place
over possession of the Matrix.

The Fallen who was
stronger at his will did,

surrendered no choice,
but to steal and hide it from him.

In the ultimate sacrifice, they gave
their lives to seal the Matrix away

in a tomb made of
their very own bodies.

A tomb
we cannot find.

Somewhere,
buried in this desert,

that deadly machine
remains.

The Fallen knows
where it is.

And if he finds the Tomb of the Primes,
your world will be no more.

Okay so how do we stop it?

Only a Prime
can defeat the Fallen.

Optimus Prime?

So you met a Prime?

You must have met
a great descendant.

Is he alive?

Here?
On this planet?

He sacrificed himself
to save me.

So he's dead.

Without a Prime,
it's impossible.

No one else
could stop the Fallen.

So the same energy that's going
to be used to reactivate the machine...

Could that energy somehow be used
to reactivate Optimus

and bring him
back to life?

It was never designed
for that purpose,

but it's an energy,
like no other.

So then how do you get us to the Matrix
before the Decepticons get to me?

Follow your mind, your map,
your symbols,

what you got in the sand,
it's your bloom.

When dawn alights
the Dagger's tip,

three kings will reveal
the doorway.

Find the doorway!

Go now, go!

That was my mission.
It's your mission now.

Go before
the Decepticons find me

and find you.

That was
my CIA contact.

Says Ancient Sumerian used to call
the Gulf of Aqaba

- the Dagger's Tip.
- That's the dagger's tip.

- It's part of the Red Sea.
- Got it.

It divides Egypt and Jordan
like the tip of a blade.

29 and a half degrees north.
35 east.

There it is.

Okay, first thing we gotta do
is get Optimus to Dagger's Tip.

How are you gonna get him
halfway around the world?

We're gonna make a call.

We got the cops.

I can't go to prison, guys!

Sam, you gotta get off
this road and lay low.

Man, they'll pick up.

This is just called
blending in like a ninja.

How about I'll lay my piss
in your face?

They're gone.

Wait another time.

How are you gonna make
the call to Lennox?

You are in the worldwide. What,
they're gonna tranquil in one base?

They'll track you here
in seconds.

CIA is all over this place.

You're gonna call?

Okay,
that's--that's a good idea.

- Alright?
- I mean I just was...

My mind in other things.

Like why don't you get
being chipped in prison.

New Jersey

This departure:
2100 hours.

So we're shipped in
back to base.

This is central at stake.

Major Lennox, phone call.

Lennox, I'm with the kid.
The kid, you know?

One with the attitude break?

I need the truck.
The truck.

We got a possible resurrection
going on over here.

You're not gonna believe
where we are.

Code Tot,
as in King Tutankhamen,

back of a $1 bill.

Coordinates for air-drop,
29.5 north, 34.88 east.

Get it.
Write it down, write it.

Oh, my God.

I gotta go, okay.
I hate the cops.

W-Wait, who are you?

Wait, it's me.
Leo, me, Leo, Leo. Leo.

The cops are coming right now.
We need to go.

Coordinates
29.5 north, 34.88 east.

Tip of the Red Sea,
Gulf of Aqaba.

Egypt.

Are you serious?

Sir.

Even if we could figure out a way
to get big man over there.

How is this little kid's
supposed to bring him back to life?

I don't know.

But we gotta trust him.

Okay, let's go
over it again.

- When the dawn arise...
- When the dawn arise the dagger's tip,

- the three kings...
- ...will reveal the doorway.

That's what he said.
You know what that means?

- No, what does it mean?
- I have no idea.

Oh my God, oh my God.
Checkpoint, checkpoint.

I don't have
my passport.

Passport.
Idiota (Idiot)!

They have cams at top.

He's the one
that they want.

Alright, chill.
Let's be nice to them.

I can handle it.
These are my people.

- Yeah.
- I'm 136.

Oh great, a frickin' munchkin.

Oh, little people are mean.
Tell him he's tall.

- What do you want?
- I want to go to...

The Dagger's Tip, right?

Egypt, Jordan.
We wanna go there.

Me and my family.
This is my family.

- This is my son, my other son.
- Hi there.

My daughter.

We're tourists
from New York.

- New York?
- Yes. Yes.

50 kilometres.

We're going to get one
of your falafels, thank you!

Yeah,
thank you very much.

- New York.
- I know, I know you from somewhere.

No, we do not work
for the CIA.

Decepticons,
voice location.

Detected.

Starscream in pursuit.

Undercover, yo, you gotta blend in
with your surrounding.

You know, you gotta be
part of the landscape.

Awesome.

I think
aliens built that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Go, move it!
Move it.

- What?
- Hey, guard us.

Low-profile,
don't make a scene, okay?

Yeah, some of us
got work to do!

Dumb Autobots.

Estimated time of detachment
NEST, 0600 AM

Being my girlfriend
is hazardous to your health.

Yeah, well,
girls like dangerous boys.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Why don't you say it?

Ladies first.

Okay, so tonight,
you're gonna be a gentleman.

You're really chivalrous.

Why are you mad at me?

You know what?
Baby, I'm not...

I'm not mad.

You realise that I just flew 3,000 miles
to keep you from getting killed.

I know.

Who else could be
your girlfriend too?

Look at the things
that go through with me.

And now we're underneath
the moon and the stars

and the three most beautiful
pyramids on the planet

and you still can't even tell me
that you love me.

- What?
- Wait.

- Why do boys always change the subject?
- The moon and the stars...

- Sam...
- Come with me really quick.

Simmons, Leo,
wake up!

Listen, Astronomy class, page 47,
you remember the class?

No, no, I was only in college
for two days, you remember that?

- Yeah, well, get up. Up, up.
- What are you talking about?

Can you see
those three stars?

You see how the last one
touches the horizon?

That's Orion's belt.

It's also called the Three Kings
and the reason for that is

the three Egyptian kings who built
the pyramids in Giza built them

to mear those stars.

So it's like an aerial staring
straight in the face.

They all point due east
towards Jordan.

The mountains of Petra.

We got a seatbelt malfunction.
We gotta have to divert...

Flight in lower,
prepare for bail-out.

Bail-out, bail-out,
bail-out, bail-out?

Alright, team,
grab your shoots.

Bail-out?

Familiar with the standard
MC-4?

Of course not. I've never jumped out
of a publicly good airplane before.

Wait a minute,
is this really happening?

Yeah.

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

You're behind this,
aren't you?

What are you talking about?

You heard the pilot.
These guys don't mess around.

This is standard procedure.
I'm just following orders to the letter.

Do you know
what you said?

You, just find the captain
and your career--

Wait, what was that?
What's that?

That's not good.

Come on.
Right this way, right this way!

I can't jump
out of an airplane.

Come here.
Come here.

Because I have to secure
the VIPs first.

Okay, I want you
to listen very carefully.

Remember as everything
that I say.

East to the GPS trackers, so
you can be found by search and rescue.

- Look, are you listening?
- I can't.

- Alright, alright.
- Alright.

When the plane that shoot
inflates into the air,

pull the pin
and open some air,

break your rack up,
lose your primary.

I want you
to pull the blue.

I need you to pull it
really hard.

Not right now.
We're on the plane, you dumbass!

Did he say goodbye?

No, he didn't even
say goodbye.

General,
we're loaded and ready.

You give us the go, and we'll be ready
to press in five minutes.

- Excellent.
- Sir,

you need to see this.
Now.

Have we checked
these coordinates?

Egypt, sir.
They're air-dropping in.

You gotta be kidding me.

He knows something.

We need to be ready to back him up,
if this thing goes hot.

Copy that.

CIA just got a hit
on the boy.

Hundred miles from the location
on that little map there.

It's getting hotter.

It's gotta be...
around here somewhere.

It's here somewhere,
guys.

Oh yeah, why?

'Cause we're trusting
Grandpa Blackbird

who doesn't even know
what planet he's on.

On his defense,
this is the biggest doorway

I've ever seen
in my entire life.

Okay. Well, that's great.
Let me do a quick search, alright?

Nope.

Ever questioned mind, guys, that
archaeologists have been here before.

There's nothing here.

You realise it's heart-break,
despair, kid.